My Girl & Me
Updated: Mar 11
Written one year ago today. Little did I know we'd have just over two weeks left together. When I helped to save this little girl from being euthanized, little did I know, she'd help to save me.
We've been on such a beautiful journey together, and I know our time is getting limited (but isn't it, always?).
I wanted to share a bit about our life together.
When I had gotten sober, Bella helped me so much.
What I began to do with and for her: - I learned quickly to put her first, which helped get me out of myself - I got up early to walk her, and enjoyed it. - I got her food ready before mine. - I brushed her - We began to hike together, and take long walks. I mean, 3+ hours at times. - I began to photograph. She let me do my thing, as she did hers. Sometimes she'd sit there patiently while I did my thing. - Sometimes she'd let me know when she was ready to move along, and after sometimes fighting it, I obliged. - We’ve traveled many places together. - My love for her grew beyond what I ever thought was possible, through these times. - We became connected like no other. - I feel warmth in her- her eyes, her movements, her gentleness, and her intelligence. She's just got a way about her.....
As her health began to decline, I see that I may have still been selfish in some ways, but I trust that God had her where she needed to be and that I was where I needed to be in our walk together.
I've realized: - I have and learned patience on another level. - I have so much more compassion for her, and the helpless. - I look in her eyes and realize how much she depends on me for everything. - I see so, so much God in her, it's unbelievable. - I believe the relationship we have should mirror our relationship with God - I see how she lives in the moment, truly. Just takes it as it comes, sniffs out what's right in front of her. - I see how she is so accepting, and see how adaptive she really is. - I see how gentle and frail she really is, now. - I see how she can't help what's happening, but she still continues to adjust. They don't think about it. They just "do". - I see such humility in her. - I see how our journey together has been so beneficial for us both - We taught each other to live. - We taught each other what unconditional love truly is. - We taught each other how to enjoy the journey together, and as individuals.
We will always be side-by-side, no matter what. This is us.
I know we will part, but we have each others' hearts, and I believe I will see her again. The time may feel long here, but she will be whole, and the time is different there than it is here.
But for now, I will take each day as it comes, just as she has taught me, and not worry about tomorrow. That will have its own challenges. Today is enough.
Our life together has been nothing short of miraculous, and I won't take it for granted.
Her care may be almost a full-time job, but I wouldn't have it any other way.
May peace and love be with you tonight, and may you feel God's arms surrounding you as you drift to sleep.
With all our love,
My Girl & Me...
Backstory on the photo: This evening, I felt so compelled to somehow get a photo of us on the trail this evening. I saw a few cars parked along the road, and was really hoping and visualizing seeing someone come down the trail, that could take our picture. Just as we were walking back to the car, I turned around and saw two people walking, and yelled to them as they veered off the trail toward their car. Low & behold, it was someone I knew, a very sweet gal, and a photographer, no less! I was thrilled that it was her, and I let her know it.
This photo was meant to be.
Photo by Bobbie Ann, edited by me.